Its a sign.

I'm home alone till Sunday.

I had a visitor last night. I don't know its actual identity but it was behind our fireplace and making a hell of a lot of noise. (When Beauty and the Geek was on - not happy.)

I had to kindly interrupt my neighbour from hosting a dinner party and a lovely cooked meal from his charming wife to help with with "the situation." "The situation" being something behind the fire that could potentially kill me, while watching Beauty and the Geek

There's nothing like seeing a man in an Armani suit with a flash light around his head standing up in your fireplace. Nothing was found but the noise is still in there. Its a combination of rustling, growling and scratching.

Then a huge locust (I know biblical reference here) flew inside and decided to land on my foot - well I was already at breaking point after "the situation." You know how that ended.

As I went to have a shower last night before bed barely able to contain myself from "the situation" that was still being played out in my living room there was a lizard hiding under the bathroom scales. I kid you not. Its still there. I'm too scared to attempt to move it and I've run out of people I can bribe to help me with bottles of wine.

My neighbour just told me they had a rat in their laundry this week and that "she's a nice girl from Bellevue Hill and if she See's a snake she outta here..."
I'm taking these freaky phenomenon as a sign that we should be moving back to the city.
Sometimes the universe must be laughing its arse off.

I would like to apologise for the use of damn and arse in this weeks posts. Its been a busy week. Please don't judge me. The pest man is coming at 5pm. Its amazing how "unbooked" a pest man can become if you cry on the telephone. x